Sunday, March 2, 2014

How I Married Young




Photo of Brittney Moses and Husband
Founder of Unashamed Imapct

So every time we get caught in the mall, grocery store, taking a walk, or where ever. People are always commenting on how young we look as parents of 4 small children. My husband and I got married very young, we only knew each other about 9 months and then we already were planing to getting married.
The funny thing about this is when I hear people say that they only knew each other for three month and then get married I automatically get judgmental. YES! I do, I'm very transparent and have know shame in announcing my faults when I'm wrong. I just don't understand how you can marry someone you don't know, but I did so....

Well any ways back to the story. We married in September on 15th of 2007, my husband was 19 and I was 18 going on 19. My birthday is in September so It was a week away. We had already had a son named D'ior prior to our marriage, he was only 3 months at the time.

Before, when we met each other I had NO clue he was my husband. I was so rude to him, I was ignorant, selfish, arrogant, conceited, and just a rude individual to be around. I cant even believe he continued to stay with me. '

So to get to the story here it goes.

My Prayer.....
Literally a week or two before I found him, I got down on my knee's and I prayed and asked God to send me my husband. I was only 17 at this time , and I was so tired of the same old boys using me for my looks. So I asked the one who I knew would hear me.God!!! Honestly I didn't know it would come so fast, but.......

How we met.... 
In 2006 Myspace was the spot, just like now Facebook is the popular thing in. Back then we were hooked on Myspace and this was away for me to meet new guys. Well one day I was roaming through some Myspace profiles and I don't know how, but I came across his page. As I scrolled down on his page their was a section that said "The Bible is my Favorite Book". Of course in my head I'm thinking...Why are dudes always trying to use the Bible as a way to get females. So I was very persistent in finding out why he would say such a thing. So I sent him a message asking him if he put that on his page just to get females and he replied NO!, the Bible is my favorite book. Surprised  I was but, interested at the same time he caught my attention. From then on we became cyber friends and for about a month or two an we continued to have conversations over the internet daily. I started to look forward to seeing a new message each day. Long story short we finally went on a GHETTO DATE lol and I was rude as usual.

Our Relationship....
At first it was all about lust I wasn't interested in his money I have never been that type of girl. I was interested in what he could offer me more so on the lines of emotionally, supportive, a friend, good company and casual fornication. YES!! we had alot of those sinful desires that we had to be delivered from. It had to be only a few months and I found out I was pregnant. At the time I wasn't afraid or upset, I just knew I wanted a baby so bad I didn't care about the aftermath. Although I did feel very convicted by God. I knew I was wrong , but I wanted to be loved and I needed to feel that void being filled that had been missing.
We fought so much during this time, and I have to say I was so mean to him. I sometimes felt bad because I treated him so disrespectfully. We would go to church and then have sex and then pray and ask God to forgive us and then repeat it again. Eventually it got so bad that my hormones where changing and I just didn't want to be bothered any more. One night we got into a huge argument and he came over my house and asked me to marry him. I couldn't believe he still wanted to be with me after all the confusion I had started, sarcastically I said yes, not realizing how serious marriage is.

Age aint nothing but a number......
So their was apart of me that was so excited and complete about announcing this new engagement. I was telling everyone and trying to show off my new ring when ever I could. Once I told my family, they didn't seem to be happy for me or my soon to be husband. Instead everyone criticized us about not finishing school, not going to college, not having a career, and the one thing I herd the most was I was to young.
I was once told that Mary got married to Joseph when she was only in her teens, somewhere close to 14. So I didn't care about age, to me age was nothing but a number. I was very mature for my age and I felt as though I could take on anything. After hearing so many people's advice eventually I fell into the trap Satan had set up for me. I didn't consult God I just went with my conscience instead of going with the Holy Spirit. I called the engagement off at 5 month pregnant allowing the same generational curse that had struck all the women in my family to almost take place in me.

Long story short......
Two months later when I was 8 1/2 months pregnant, I asked my husband to come over to my house and I told him that I wanted to call the engagement back on. After that day we started to plan for our wedding. We went to marriage counselling for about two months and then we finally got married.

Photo of Brittney Moses and Husband
Founder of Unashamed Imapct

After Marriage...
It was terrible!! lol I hated it at first. I had no respect or knew how to submit to my husband. We almost got a divorce so many times, but by the grace of God he has kept us strong.

It has been almost 7 years of hard work in this  marriage, we have been through so much and alot has happened, but all I can say is God has healed us and made us whole. We are not perfect nor will be ever be. We still argue, fuse and fight and make up, but God gets all the Glory. When you begin to put him first he will work all things out in your favor.

My husband encourages me so much, I look to him as my teacher, friend, brother, my personal comedian, and my intimate one. I love him so much and especially who God has called him to be. He is a wonderful husband and the father to our children.

Marrying Young....
So what do I say about getting married young. I do not think its bad in fact I consider it rather than being 40 something, not that thats bad but,  Its harder when your older because, your stuck in your ways and its alot more complicated. When your young your able to grow together and get to know each other in your youth.  I also say consult the Holy Spirit. Pray and seek the face of God before you make such a huge change. It's not something you do out of your emotions or sexually to fulfill a desire/void. Marriage is a sacred covenant commitment not just between you and your significant other its also with God. Be Still and wait for him to make that decision for you. DO NOT RUSH! God knows your heart and what you desire. Work on you in the mean time and when the time is right he will send you that man/women your suppose to be with.






Stay Encouraged 
Never give up
Always move forward
Be Spirit Lead by God


Let's Keep In Touch

                                                               

   Thank You for reading and stay tuned for more.
                                                                                    Hugs from  Deja  Lynn
                             



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